


Please Don't Take My Sunflower Away

by jessonthecoast



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, M/M, Weecest, Wincest - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-02
Updated: 2013-12-02
Packaged: 2018-01-03 06:51:21
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,289
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1067367
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jessonthecoast/pseuds/jessonthecoast
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“You are my sunflower, my only sunflower,<br/>“You make me happy when skies are grey.<br/>“You’ll never know, dear, how much I love you,<br/>"Please don't take my sunflower away."</p>
            </blockquote>





	Please Don't Take My Sunflower Away

They say that if you talk to a person in a coma that they can hear you. They also say that if they’re in a sleep that deep, that words can even wake them up. Some words from a significant other and all of the sudden they’re awake. Maybe that’s how they came up with the tale of Sleeping Beauty; ‘true love’s kiss will wake you up’ and all that. Dean wasn’t exactly Sam’s true love or anything but they were definitely more than brothers.

Right now Dean’s brother was lying in a hospital bed in a coma. Sam had white bandages circling most of his head, his face and the crown of his head were the only things that weren’t covered. He had a cut on his lip, a few along his cheekbones, and a gash on his jaw. The rest of him was, for the most part, okay. A couple of nurses had already dealt with Dean. They had stitched up the cuts that he had and had given him some pain meds despite how much he told them that he was fine. Their dad was currently being sewn up and after, he’d check himself out against the hospital’s medical advice and go after the demon that did this to them.

Instead of sitting in the room with his brother doing nothing, Dean decided to go take a walk around the hospital. He hoped that maybe the blood flow would give him some sort of idea of where to go from here but he could only think about all the things that he should have done. He should have gotten up sooner, he should have fought better, fired quicker, been faster, tried harder. He shouldn’t have let the demon get the jump on him like it did. He should have done a million things different and maybe if he had, his family, however small, wouldn’t be in this godforsaken hospital. This hospital with its too clean white walls. This hospital with the smell of people dying masked by the odor of various sanitizing chemicals, and machines beeping out the heartbeat of the living. This hospital that could be Sam’s death bed.

The more Dean thought about it, the more he was kicking himself in the ass for not being there to help his family. He couldn’t help the feeling of needing to carry his dad and Sam. His dad with all of his hatred toward anything that would do harm to the people and the things he loved. Sam, with how young he was, just 19, still seemed like just a kid. He was only a kid but in hunter-terms 19 is practically 29. Without the weight of both lives, lives he had gotten so accustomed to carrying and looking after, what would he have left? His dad? His dad who every day would look at him and see failure if Sam died? No. Hell no. He wasn’t going to let that happen to his brother.

After several hours of wondering aimlessly around the hospital, Dean finally found himself in front of Sam’s room.  _Sam’s room_. The room he shouldn’t have because he shouldn’t be here. The guilt of letting his baby brother and his dad down caused a tear to run down Dean’s face. Before anyone saw it, he rubbed a hand over his cheek and cleared his throat. Dean went into Sam’s room, pulled a chair next to the bed, and proceeded to wait until his little brother woke up.

Minutes ticked by, then hours, then several days and still nothing new. Dean would get up in the morning, stretch and twist to crack his stiff back, find coffee, get food, sit and watch Sam. In the afternoon, he would find something to drink, get food, go to the bathroom, sit and watch Sam. At night, find something to drink, get food, go to the bathroom, sit and watch Sam until he fell asleep. Next day, it’d start all over again. For five days, this was his routine. Every day, John would come in to check in on his sons, see if anything had changed, and then leave to look for another hunt.

On day six, Dean went down to get his dinner and ate it in the cafeteria, hoping to hear some noises other than the sound of the machines and the voices from the nurses that would come in to check on Sam. Dean found a booth and was in the middle of his lukewarm burger when he noticed that in front of him was a vase of flowers, a vase of sunflowers, and was reminded of that day he and Sam took a hike a few weeks ago……

_It was the day after a hunt, John was back at the room sleeping it off and the boys snuck out to the woods behind their motel._

_“I’ll race you!” Dean yelled at his brother once they got a far enough distance into the woods, getting a head start with a smile painted on his face._

_“To what end?” Sam asked, following after his brother._

_“You’ll know when you see it!” And off they went, chasing each other, snaking through the trees, feeling the warmth of the sun and the wind hitting them in the face as they sprinted. They could hardly hear the sound of the leaves under their feet as they ran because of the blood pumping in their ears. It was nice to finally be running to something as opposed to running away from something._

_They swerved this way and that, narrowly missing several branches and barely avoiding vines that tried to trip them. Every once in a while Sam would pull ahead of Dean but as soon as he did, Dean would change his course and Sam would be behind him. Dean was always trying to make sure that he was the one leading the way because he knew where they were going._

_Regardless, Sam was still trying to beat his brother, typical sibling rivalry stuff, so he forced his legs to move faster and faster, ducking every so often and hurdling himself over fallen objects. He was just barely panting when he saw Dean start to slow down and come to a stop. Instead of halting, he blew past his brother. After a few feet, Sam stopped and his breath caught slightly when he saw why his brother was standing motionless. Sam was at the top of hill, looking down on a picnic set up of sorts that was sitting next to a river that curved and bent around several trees._

_“Dude, I thought when we started this thing that we weren’t going to have any chick flick moments.” Sam said, trying to keep the laugh in his throat and failing slightly._

_“Oh shut up. You’re going to enjoy this, Sammy, and you know it,” Dean told him, coming up behind him and ruffling his hair._

_Dean was right; Sam was going to enjoy this. Just like he was going to enjoy making fun of Dean later on for doing this right after he got over the fact that Dean actually took the time to set this up._

_“C’mon, there’s cherry pie,” Dean called back as he started walking down the hill._

_Sam smiled, more to himself, as he watched his brother. They were in the middle of the forest, more than likely there was no one around in the close vicinity, and it was just the two of them._

_Already situated on the blanket and getting the pie out of a small cardboard box, Dean turned around to look at his brother who was still standing at the top of the hill and had a weird smile on his face._

_“I will eat this pie by myself if you don’t get down here!”_

_And with that, Sam finally ran down the hill after Dean and plowed straight into him, making his brother fall on his back on the blanket and laid on top of him. Dean was sandwiched between the ground and Sam. Not a bad place to be, he thought to himself._

_“I love it,” Sam mumbled and molded his lips to his brother’s. Sam would have said a different string of three words but he knew how his brother felt about them and Sam respected that. Even if Dean never said ‘I love you’, Sam knew that Dean did._

_Dean carded his fingers through Sam’s soft brown hair and ran his hands down his brother’s back, pulling him closer. As much as he’d love to taste sweet cherry pie, the sweet and salty taste of his brother would do just fine._

_About an hour later, the boys zipped up their jeans and buttoned up their plaid shirts. Dean made a pillow out of his jacket and Sam curled up real close to his brother’s body with his head on Dean’s arm. The two of them laid there listening to leaves rustling and water flowing while they basked in the sun and Dean absentmindedly ran his fingers through Sam’s hair._

_Somewhere upstream someone had dropped yellow flowers in the water. Dean looked closer and saw that they were sunflowers. He watched them drift along, being pushed this way and that as the water pulled the yellow flowers around rocks, the occasional fallen leaf, and ripples of water. After the majority of the sunflowers had drifted away, one lone flower got caught in an eddy and spun around and around. Dean watched and waited for it to pull itself out of the little water tornado but it continued to spin. As the petals started to blur together, Dean thought it started to look like something he’s seen before._

_Just then Dean felt his brother stir. His fingers stilled in Sam’s hair as he resituated in his spot. After wiggling around a bit, Sam finally settled with the position he was in before but was now staring up at his brother, hazel eyes gazing into green ones._

_“Hey,” Sam crooned with a lazy smile._

_“Hey you,” Dean replied, moving a few strands of hair out of his brother’s eyes._

_“I don’t want to go,” Sam sighed._

_Dean laughed and said, “We’ll stay a little longer but eventually we’ll have to go, Sammy.”_

_“Okay,” Sam huffed and went back to staring at Dean’s face, counting the freckles and memorizing the placement of each one. It wasn’t an easy task, there were a lot of them and it seemed like the sun brought more of them out. Another thing the sun brought out was the varying shades of green in Dean’s eyes. Bright and darks alike all swirled around black pupils. He had lips that were plump, pink, and pouty and Sam loved kissing them, getting them caught between his teeth, and loved it even more when Dean bit them because Sam found a good spot to tease. Then there were times when Dean would get this look on his face, this lighthearted and childlike look, and for a second you could see the kind of person that he really was underneath the hunter exterior. Sam treasured those moments, they didn’t happen very often. It was only when he was around Sam, and they were alone, that you could see that he wasn’t always as…hard as he was raised to be._

_“What?” Dean asked and the side of his mouth turned up slightly._

_“Nothing, I’m just,” he began but was briefly at a loss for words. “I like your face,” Sam giggled because he realized that the compliment sounded weirder out loud than it was in his head._

_Dean snorted and responded, “Thanks, kid. Yours’ ain’t too bad either.”_

_Sam smiled at his brother and stretched his neck to brush his lips against Dean’s and snuggled back into the crook in his brother’s arm. He placed his arm over Dean’s chest and toyed with the little amulet charm that his brother kept around his neck at all times, and smiled at the memory of why he had it._

_After Sam settled, Dean looked back over and saw the little sunflower start drifting along after the others and realized why that sunflower spinning around in the water looked so familiar._

_“Sunflower eyes,” Dean whispered without realizing it._

_“Hm?” Sam asked, turning his head and looking at Dean with bright hazel eyes. Sam’s eyes were always described as ‘hazel’; one simple word to describe all of the colors that reflected in his eyes. Shades of teal and navy and seaweed green all spun around brown and a little bit of yellow, and everyone just called it ‘hazel’. That simple word did not do it justice. They were not just hazel. They looked like sunflowers floating in water._

_Dean looked down at his brother’s eyes and repeated a little louder, “Sunflower eyes.”_

_“What?” He asked, lifting off of Dean’s shoulder and staring at him._

_“Your eyes,” he began. “They look like sunflowers.”_

_“My eyes don’t look like sunflowers, Dean,” Sam laughed. “And that is the cheesiest-”_

_Then Dean pounced on his brother, making him fall over on his back, and started tickling his little brother and Sam exploded with laughter. “They do too, Sammy,” Dean said, laughing along with him._

_“De! Quit it!” Sam giggled as fingers wiggled over his tummy and his sides were pinched lightly. “Cut it out!”_

_“Nope, not gonna happen!” Dean smiled. “Not until you say they look like sunflowers!” Then for a quick second, Dean thought about a song that his mom used to sing to him while she was playing with him like this on rainy days and made a slight change to the words._

“You are my sunflower, my only sunflower,

“You make me happy when skies are grey.

“You’ll never know, dear, how much I love you _,” he sang around the giggles but Sam interrupted him before he was able to finish._

_“That’s not how the song goes, dork!” Sam managed to yelp._

_“That’s how it goes now,” Dean told him while his fingers trailed up to Sam’s armpits. “C’mon, admit it!”_

_“Okay! Uncle, Uncle!”_

_“Say the magic words, baby boy!”_

_“They look like sunflowers! De, they look like sunflowers!”_

_“Now, was that so hard?” Dean asked after the most of the giggles had subsided but he was still laying on top of his brother._

_“Yes, it was.”_

_“Liar.”_

_“Fine, if mine look like sunflowers then yours look like…..” Sam paused for a little while and even though Dean was on top of him, he looked around trying to find some sort of flower or plant,_ some _thing that might resemble the eyes that he loved so much. When he finally found a green patch of something not too far off, Sam exclaimed, “Clovers!”_

_“Clovers, huh?”_

_“Yep, four leaf clovers.”_

_“Ha, I dare you to come up with a song for me.”_

_“I will, I’ve got plenty of time to come up with one,” Sam declared……_

Damn straight you’ve got plenty of time, Dean thought to himself. There was no way in hell Dean was letting his brother die. Not in this hospital, not because of some demon, and not because Dean couldn’t get save him in time.

Suddenly Dean got this rage burning hot inside of him. His arm flew out in front of him and he swung outward, sending his food and the vase flying across the table and onto the floor. Somewhere in the cafeteria, someone shouted at him but he didn’t have time to care because he was already out the doors and on his way to Sam’s room. He took the elevator up, rounded a few corners and burst into his brother’s room.

“Sam, c’mon man. Wake up,” he yelled once the door had clicked shut behind him. “It’s been six fucking days! C’mon Sleeping Beauty, you’ve had enough rest now,  _get up!”_  But Sam didn’t move. The machines still whirled, beeped, and the lights flashed but nothing else new happened. Dean paced the room, wanting to punch and kick every goddamn thing in the room because maybe the noise would wake up Sam but he settled on shoving at the chair that he’d been using as place to sit and sleep. He was tired because a hospital chair wasn’t the two star motel beds he was used to. He was pissed off because this wasn’t how things were supposed to go.

“We were supposed to find the thing that killed mom and go and live normal lives,” he said, voice getting a bit calmer. “You weren’t supposed to get hurt on this hunt, or any hunt. I was supposed to be there. That should be me lying in this damn bed, not you!”

This shouldn’t be his brother in this sterilized, claustrophobic, godforsaken hospital. But it is and he can’t change that. Sam has to be the one to pull through, has to ignore the white light and turn back, has to know who’s here waiting for him and why.

He grabbed the chair that he’d been using for the past week, pulled it close to the bed, and sat next to Sam’s side. “That day, that day at the river, you said that you didn’t want to go, and- and I told you that we could stay a little longer. So, Sammy, for me,  _for me_ , can you just stay a little longer.” He paused, waiting for Sam to blink, to twitch his fingers, to wiggle his toes, to fucking  _do something_ , but nothing happened. 

"Sam, you can’t just tap out. You- you can’t just leave, not now." Dean’s voice started to crack on the last word. But it’s not like any one could hear it crack, he was the only person in the room other than his comatose brother and it’s not like Sam could hear him or could feel him or see him.

With a deep, broken sigh, Dean got up out of his chair, turned off the light, and climbed into the bed next to Sam. He rested his head on his brother’s chest, feeling and hearing the slow beat of his heart, and curled in close to his brother’s body. Dean let out a shaky breath as a tear fell from his tired green eyes and landed onto Sam’s gown. After the first drop fell, he let the rest go because there was no one left that he needed to be strong in front of, no one he needed to look after.

He turned his head into Sam’s chest and let out a few more sobs, hoping that was the end of them, then wiped the last few drops from his eyes. Dean craned his neck up and placed a small, wet kiss on his brother’s lips and waited. He searched Sam’s face for any sign that he felt that. Nothing. His head fell to the pillow and he slumped back down against Sam, laying an arm across his chest.

What else could he do? There wasn’t anything. So Dean decided to sing to his baby brother.

“ _You are my sunflower, my only sunflower,_

_“You make me happy, when skies are grey,_

_“You’ll never know, dear, how much I love you,”_ but once again, Dean couldn’t finish the song. The last time was because Sam interrupted him and now because he couldn’t get the words out. His sunflower was being taken away from him because of this life and because of this damn job and, ultimately, because Dean failed. His shoulders shook and he hid his face as the tears streamed from his eyes.

The he felt a hand on the back of his head and a shift under his body.

“ _Please don’t take my sunflower away,”_ came a familiar, but groggy, voice.

_Sam._


End file.
